**In case you have forgotten since last post. This fall we are going to be going through the book "Youth Culture 101" by Walt Mueller. We'll be going through a chapter a week. ** Remember this is a summary, there is a ton of great stuff in this book. If you like the blog, I encourage you to buy it or contact me at jon@hrbcrichmond.org and I'll get it for you.***

First and foremost it's essential to remember that children (and even teenagers) are a gift from God. In Psalm 127:3-5 the writer says:

Don't you see that children are God's best gift?
      the fruit of the womb his generous legacy?
   Like a warrior's fistful of arrows
      are the children of a vigorous youth.
   Oh, how blessed are you parents,
      with your quivers full of children!

Our kids are a blessing from God. This is a lot easier in the childhood years before they develop the wonderful skill of talking back. (which teenagers have perfected). It's important to remember that even through tough times, God's gifts are still God's gifts.

With that in mind it's also important to remember that there is no such thing as the perfect kid OR the perfect parent. Our sinful human nature pretty much eliminates that possibility. We are beings that constantly try to look out for ourselves. This is sure to cause friction in the household as your student tries to grasp these issues. This also helps us to not compare ourselves to others. Even with a new born I look at other parents and think, "Am I doing this right? They look like they have it together so much more than I do." Again it's part of our nature but as parents we must realize that all the other parents out there have issues too. There's a good chance they might be comparing themselves to you.

That doesn't mean that we don't strive to be better parents. I think that as parent's of teenagers, there's always a chance to learn more. I've seen plenty of over confident parents think that they have it figured out, only to learn that their child is leading a life that is completely different than they thought. We are in a constant state of learning. But why should we constantly learn how to raise our kids?

We constantly want to learn more about the world our teens live in because, if we're honest, we'll see that the world doesn't have a problem with raising our kids. As our lives get busier our family time gets interrupted more meaning that as parents, your time to teach and raise your children becomes less. They never stop learning. They just learn from something or someone else. In most cases teens learn from their friends about major issues in life.  Family time is of critical importance in the development of a teenager.

The good news is that just like all humans, teenagers have a longing for God. They long for something that will fill the emptiness inside. The tough part comes because teens are in a process to figure this out. They will look to many things to try to fill that void inside them. Unfortunately for us, there is not a quick fix. It takes time and work to help students process through the fact that the void inside is a longing to be close to God. Teens will make mistakes along the road. (kinda like your did when you were a teenager) The key is to extend them the grace that has been shown to you. Remember your job is to model Christ to your children.

A word of encouragement before this post ends.  It's okay to feel helpless. In fact, it's downright normal. I'm pretty sure that most of the parents around you feel the same way you do. If you are going through a tough time with your teen I encourage you (I mean that Walt Mueller encourages you) to read Psalm 13:1-4. Then take a moment to read verses 5 and 6. In the middle of suffering and tough times parenting, God is still there and God is still with us. It's okay to be helpless. God has a history of coming to the aid of the helpless.  Remember that prayer is an awesome and powerful thing. I encourage you to pray for your child everyday. Not just for the huge test they have, but that the longing in their soul will be filled.

That's all for this week. I'm not sure if these will be this long in the future. This was chapter 1 after all! If you have any thoughts, or questions, feel free to comment on this blog by clicking below. You guys are awesome and I love partnering with you in ministry.